A Test of Patience

During the week leading up to Christmas, I seriously wish I had a dollar for every time someone said the following to me because I would have been able to pay off my student loans.

“How are you able to stay so positive/happy/jolly with all of this going on?”

You have to understand the amount of shit that hit the fan this week. The perfect storm of ongoing gastrointestinal issues, a car accident, and the Christmas holiday did not take me out to dinner prior to fornication.

In chronological order:

  • Dating back to October, I determined that my digestive system loathes me. Between nausea, diarrhea, and fluids coming out of incorrect orifices, I am having tons of fun. I thought I had it under control through November, but the symptoms came back full force a week before Christmas, leading to an emergency room visit. Thankfully, nothing major happened, and they sent me home within a few hours.
  • I saw a gastroenterologist (GI doctor) the following Monday to get some answers. The doctor was awesome. He spent over a half hour in the office with me and seemed determined to help me get some answers. He even scheduled me within a week to get a scope done on my digestive system. Two days later, the office called me up to tell me that they ran my insurance. There was a $250 copay, and I still had around $1,500 on my deductible to pay. I had no problem paying it over time, but the office demanded me to pay it all upfront or within three months following the procedure. Who in their right mind can afford $600 a month for that?! I was forced to cancel the procedure until I could get some more answers.
  • That Wednesday I swung through a Starbucks drive-thru to grab a morning coffee. As I pulled out onto the road and prepared to make a right turn onto the highway, another car smacked into the front of my car. Again, thankfully, nobody was hurt. I waited about an hour to have my car towed. I took right to the body shop where a rental car awaited my arrival.
  • Throw in the fact that Christmas approached quickly, and I crammed all of my shopping into one day somehow.

Now back to the original question: How in the living fuck did I stay positive during all of this? Honestly, I didn’t. I was pissed off and beaten down through all of it. However, I focused on simply getting from one moment to the next. Any one of the above listed situations could cripple someone, but I reminded myself of staying on track with what needed to be accomplished at that given time. Also, gratitude played a huge part in keeping me grounded. Two of these situations could have ended up as life-threatening, but I walked away from the emergency room and the car accident with no significant health issues. All four of those were merely inconveniences that possessed solutions. Were they going to be pains in my ass? Absolutely. That wasn’t to say that they couldn’t be resolved though. I took it easy in between where I could and trudged forward.

Put simply, I relied on gratitude and acceptance. That’s how the fuck I made it through.

-The Caring Counselor

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